Mr. Scott Rhodes - friend, parent, dead for days.../ Your FEEDBACK

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From: John Murtari (jmurtari@akidsright.org)
Date: Sun Sep 16 2012 - 11:31:00 EDT


Good People & People of Faith,

This message has info on:

1) Mr. Scott Rhodes - friend, parent, dead for days before noticed...
2) Your FEEDBACK - NY Times


*1) Mr. Scott Rhodes - friend, parent, dead for days before noticed...*
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Several weeks ago I got a call from Mark Hough
<markh8710@hotmail.com>, he told me Scott Rhodes, a diabetic, had
been found dead in his apartment after several days had passed --
apparently from diabetic shock.

I'd met both Scott & Mark back in November of 2009.  They had
walked with me outside the local Family Courthouse,
http://www.akidsright.org/family_rights (photos), and we had
visited the local offices of Assemblyman Oaks -- later that day I
was arrested for writing on the building with Kid's Chalk (all
charges later dismissed).

Scott told his story to the Assemblyman's aid and it was gut
wrenching, being alienated from his two daughters by a former
spouse and 'system' which clearly did not value him.

Take a few minutes to look at the BEFORE video, put together by his
good friend Mark. Happy times of Scott and his kids together:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MEZOPhWNWZE

I felt terrible to hear of the circumstances of his passing.  Mark
told me there would be a memorial service and I wanted to be there
and pay my respects.  I owed them both a LOT for coming out to show
their support for my NonViolent Actions 
<http://www.AKidsRight.Org/civil.htm>. We all don't have to be
arrested, every supporter that just comes to be present gives me
another layer of 'teflon' protection from the authorities -- who
are also concerned about public opinion.

Honestly, I wasn't expecting much of a Memorial Service, but I was
very wrong.  Scott was a member of the local Volunteer Fire Company
in Alexander, NY (just south of Batavia).  THERE WERE A LOT OF
PEOPLE THERE (INCLUDING HIS FATHER AND ALSO HIS TWO DAUGHTERS).

Mark put together another video to honor his good friend and
captured moments from that ceremony:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iIddZaoNOec

*The TOLL on his FAMILY*
----------------------
I didn't know any of the people there.  I asked Mark about Scott's
daughters and was surprised to hear they were sitting at one of the
tables -- they are college age now.  Hadn't had contact with Scott
or his parents for years...

It was a moving ceremony as Scott was honored by his friends.  The
expression I saw on the faces of his two children -- confusion. I
wondered what they were thinking:

"Who was this guy?  I don't remember him very well."

"These people seem to like him, but they don't know what a jerk he
was. We've been told the true story...."

"There is Grandpa.  Well, I'm not going to talk with him.  I don't
know him.  He's probably just as bad...."

"Can we go yet?"

/What a tragedy. //
//
//When we become so motivated for what we believe in -- that these//
//daily tragedies make us willing to demonstrate public & peaceful//
//personal sacrifice -- reform will happen!//
/

*2) Your FEEDBACK - NY Times - "Men, who needs them?"*
----------------------------------------------------
In response to our last message:

http://www.AKidsRight.org/archive/archive2012/0012.html


--- Mary Fanning <sunbeambread@yahoo.com>

 > Thank you for informing us of this beyond terrible editorial
 > printed in the New York Times.  It is despicable, at the very
 > least!  Even though I am a woman, I can certainly feel for all
 > men, as this trivializes the role that Fathers play in their
 > children's lives.

 > Each parent equally contributes to their child's development,
 > both physically and developmentally after conception and birth.

 > Even though my ex-husband has continued to treat me as the
 > Fathers in this email list have been treated by their children's
 > Mothers, I do not hold all men in contempt because I happened to
 > have a child with one who shares despicable traits with those
 > women who have hurt you, both individually and as a group.

 > I do know what it is like to be trivialized, brow-beaten,
 > scape-goated, given the name "birth-Mother" as opposed to Mom or
 > Mother, and demonized to my own flesh and blood, without
 > cause. It's just that he had the money and the demon-wife who
 > created the "folie-a-trois" so commonly referred to in
 > Dr. Gardner's book.

 > It's too late for me, but I hate to see anyone scapegoated,
 > especially by a newspaper which carries such political weight as
 > the New York Times.

 > I am sending a copy of my response to you to their editor.  It
 > was irresponsible journalism at its worst.

 > In unison with all alienated parents, I remain,

 > Mary


--- Earl F <earl9876@msn.com>

 > I complained to Boise State University about their slob professor
 > that wrote the article "Men: Who Needs Them?". Because I'm not
 > confident that they're going to do anything about it, I just now
 > complained to the Idaho Board of Education, and asked them to
 > revoke his teaching license. I'll keep you posted on what
 > happens.

I'm not sure if the guy is a 'slob', but I would really wonder what
he thought or knew about his own father?  Family is such a personal
and private thing.  We each have our own ideas on what is 'normal'
or 'nice' based on what we saw as kids.  That's what makes Family
Law so screwed up, the decisions are left to one or two people and
there biases....


-- follow up from Earl

 > ... I have learned, through the grapevine, that Boise State
 > sicced the cops on one man who complained to them; the cops
 > accused him of "harassment". I'll go ahead and complain to Idaho
 > Governor Otter.

You made me think a bit more about this. I found his 'web page'
with his contact email address:

http://biology.boisestate.edu/faculty-and-staff/faculty/greg-hampikian/

I'm going to email him directly, and ask him about his motivation
to write that.  Why?  And to also share his "family" background...

Best regards!

-- 

                                        John Murtari
____________________________________________________________________

Coordinator                            AKidsRight.Org
jmurtari@AKidsRight.Org                "A Kid's Right to BOTH parents"
Toll Free (315) 944-0999(x-211)        http://www.AKidsRight.Org/

  


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