Hall of Shame (page 3)
Below are more stories of families unjustly separated by the "system" without representation of counsel and/or a Jury of their peers. The starting page, with an index, is here. These people have volunteered their stories so that everyone can understand the true damage being done, and also, so those who may be experiencing your own personal "nightmare" may realize -- you are not alone! We want you to here them in their own words. We can't vouch for the accuracy of these tales and we hope you will understand the bitterness and frustration you will hear in some of these.
Children/Birth Date: Ardella (1990), Brandy (1992)
Date Separated: Feb 2001
He wants child support. I want my children but can not get any help. Is there a way you can help me with what is going on in my life. I seem to have no rights. please read the letter below and see if you can help I have tried everything including writing to the white house with no luck. tell me because he has money and I don't this is fair. Is there anybody out there that can help me.
I am enclosing some details of what I am going through. I can find no help with Lawyers or anywhere I turn I have even wrote to the white house. Presently I am one step away from losing anything I might have. I seem to have no rights what so ever and the court is listening to someone who has abused me, drugs and kept me away from having any bond with my children. You are my last hope.
P.S. I Have tried everything
I am not sure what to write here but I can only give you the truth.
I left Pennsylvania in Feb. 2001 to visit my daughter in Va to get away from a terrible situation at home where my ex was harassing me and threatening to kill me because I found his drugs and took pictures of it and showed his family. This started in august because I found out about his affair with the women he is with now.
My youngest daughter had described a pill box that he had some white powder in and a straw.she also described small white pills. his family didn't believe me but went right to him he came home from work and was over me by the sink he had the look of a crazed person in his eyes. he told me he was going to kill me for what I had done. he went to hit me and I pushed and slapped him. he called the police and said he was abused by me. when they got there they had me in the living room with my children while he was in the kitchen with the other officer which he had known. I told the officer what had happened and he could arrest me if he wanted to but I was defending myself. I told him how my daughter had seen the drugs and he looked me right in the eye and said" maam we are not here for that" they never asked him to empty his pockets or to even leave. they told me I should take the children and leave the premises. I told the officer "no this is my home and I have no where to! take the children " he told me he could not make him leave the home. when they left I put the kids to bed and stayed away from him . he threatened me again and I locked myself in the bedroom and called domestic violence hotline where I was on the phone with them half the night. I did not sleep that night in fear he would break the door down and kill me. there was violence in the past and I knew he had guns in the basement.
The next morning I told him he had to leave I could not live like this . he packed and left. I didn't know he had called the utilities and was having them shut off the end of the month. I found out when the electric company had called the house and asked if I wanted the electric to continue in my name. they had explained that he called them to terminate service so I called all the other utilities and found out he had done the same. I had copied the books in the store showing all his income and had them hidden between the mattresses of my bed along with the pictures. he got into the house while I was at the store and took them. he told me he would use the pictures against me now. he would have everything and I would be homeless he wanted the house sold and me out of it and that he would have the children and I am going to wind up with nothing. he then took the checkbook for the business and had it at his mothers house it was at this point I no longer went into the store. he came over to the house yelling that I had to run the store and I told him I didn't .I was not going to sit there and not be able to have any money to live I had to go get a job. I went and applied in over 30 places with no answer until I had a friend call the store and say I was applying for a job and they wanted a reference for me. he had his mother sitting in there selling carpet and she told them I was a totally untrustworthy that I had stole money from the business and I should not be hired.
I told him I wanted child and spousal support he said he wanted it legal and I better do it quick so I went to the courthouse and filled out the papers. the hearing was in jan of 2001. he was served with the papers and came to the house in a rage . I told him I did what you asked me to do. he reversed everything and said he never told me to do this. he said I will never get spousal support and I will never be able to fight him with no money. I told him the only one he is hurting is the children. he told me he will have the children and she will be there mother. I asked him to leave he again threatened to harm me and I told him I would call the police. he told to go ahead they think your crazy anyway remember I grew up in this town and I can do what I want to you and you have no one to turn to.he started breaking into the house when I wasn't there and the police said because his name is on the deed there is nothing I can do he has every right to enter the home even thoug! h he doesn't live there.
I went to several lawyers and they told me that this was an involved case and a few turned it down because they didn't have the time to give it. I found one that took it and wanted 800.00 up front I gave it to him and he did nothing .when it came time for the hearing he told me I didn't need him there it was just support and I will get what I was asking for which I didn't. when my husband filed for divorce I had told my lawyer I to sue on grounds of adultery he told me not to do that to let him pay for the divorce because I wouldn't have the money to pay for it myself I looked at this lawyer and asked what I had paid for which he told me the his time. meanwhile my husband refused to pay any of the bills which amounted to 2,000 a month. he said I would have to find a way they are all in my name and he don't have to pay for a thing anymore. my children told me to use there savings accounts because they hasd seen me crying and talking to my older daughter about not knowing what Iw as gonna do and Christmas was here and I had nothing for the kids. I did the best I could at that point.
In Jan my son in law came to send a few days with me and he had seen what he was doing. he had broken in again and took most of the things in the basement and the lawn mower and some rugs that where stored in there. I called the police and they still wouldn't do anything even though he has been out of the house since august they refused to do anything. all I could do at this time was cry. I finally had to use the children's savings to pay what I could of the bills and the car so it wouldn't get taken for not paying it off. I had come to the end of my rope. I had told my son in law if things go bad with the hearing I would have no choice but to let him have the kids so they have a roof over there head. I wa told to write a statement that it would be temporary until I found a place to live. I wrote it up and gave it to my daughter to bring to the lawyer because everything went wrong at the hearing. first he claimed all he made was 12,000 for the year. I tried to tell them it w! as a lie but the hearings officer didn't want to hear it. I had asked for spousal support and his lawyer said that I may be a bigamist and I couldn't believe it. the hearing officer just threw it aside. he determined that I was to get 34.00 a week per child I told him that as crazy and that I would let my children live with my ex until I got on my feet. again I was told to write it out and send it to my lawyer to have a copy sent to my ex. which the lawyer received that afternoon. which they claim they never got.
He took the children (which I thought maybe he would see what he was doing and stop but he didn't) I had my older daughter there because I couldn't be there when he took them I would have probably been put in jail so I made sure I was not there .after they were gone I came home I felt like my heart was ripped out. the next day I left and went to Virginia. I told my older daughter to take my furniture and things bring them to her house and store them in her basement and attic until I find a place to live. I figured I had better get out of the house because I felt I was in real danger now without the children there with me.
I arrived at my daughters in Virginia late that evening, spent some time with my grandchildren the next day and was feeling a little better. the following day my daughter back in pa called and said that he broke the door in on the house and changed all the locks. so now I was really homeless. I left my daughters the next day and didn't know where I was gonna go but couldn't stay with her because I was not got be a burden on my child like that. so I came to Florida to spend some time with friends that use to live near us in pa.
When I Came to Florida i stayed with friends from back home that had moved down here. they found me a room to rent for 35.00 a week and I found a job waitressing. I I was or thought I was talking with my children with e mail but it just didn't seem like the way they would answer They thought I was in texas and it had to be that way so he wouldn't find me. they where always asking where I was and that I was taking there father to court. I didn't know what they meant until I received papers in the last week of april of 2001 saying he wanted to sell the house and get custody of the children. the hearing was on the 14th of may there was no way I could do anything in such little time. I wrote the court telling them I objected to the selling of the house by the realtor he was choosing because she was a close family friend and would not be honest about the sale it went though anyway I also protested the custody but got nowhere with that either he was allowed to sell the house without me! and the court gave him full custody of the children and I was to receive supervised visitation but a person of his choice.. This was crazy I did nothing wrong but yet everything was being taken away.
he harassed my daughter until she gave him my furniture and I received a envelope with pictures of our wedding and some old pictures from an album my daughter was keeping for me. I guess this was to let me know he had my stuff. what she had told me was he wouldn't leave her alone and had the cops at her door and showed receipts for the items that I hold the bills for now. I had wrote his lawyer and told him I wanted fifty percent of everything in the marriage including the business. I had also wanted it stated that I could resume the use of my maiden name. I made a list of the things he had taken from my Daughter and my personal belongings that he had taken I also told the lawyer that Mr. Dobson knew exactly where I was and lied about not knowing my where abouts because I know these friends I stayed with called him and he had sent me that envelope with his return address on it..I never heard from his attorney again. I wrote him again and wanted to know what was going on wit! h the divorce and again stating what I wanted from the divorce settlement and that I wanted alimony. I still got no response he had also had my daughter brandy call collect which I couldn't accept because this was not my phone or home. he also gave someone the number because I got a call threatening me about the bills that where owed and how I was going to jail for them. there were two men on the phone and they told me the police were on the way and I would be arrested. the people I was staying with were not happy that he was doing this with there number and had to have it changed and unpublished so it would stop.
I didn't call there because I felt it would only cause trouble for the children. I tried on Christmas but he would not let me speak to them. then in I believe it was July of 2003. the sheriff was at the home trying to serve me with papers. I called the sheriff to pick up the papers and it was for support of the children. to be held in Flagler county court. I moved in with! a girlfriend because I felt I was causing these people trouble. I went and got an attorney to represent me and they awarded him no support. My daughter Brandy was writing me and telling me she missed and loved me. I was afraid to answer her letters because nothing I sent was getting to them I was writing and sending them to my older Daughters home until he found out and whatever he said to her. she would not accept the letters anymore and I haven't heard from here since. I had sent these girls cards for Christmas and there birthdays and they never received them and he claims I never sent them so I stopped sending them.
Feeling like a drifter and nowhere to go I rented a trailer in bunnell where I lived by myself .I never changed my post office box so I could get the letters from my Daughter. in one letter she had said they where in Florida on vacation .they knew where bunnell was but not where I lived. I thought he could have wrote and told me he would be here and where I could meet to see the children but I was told after the fact of them being here. I wrote the lawyer again asking again about the divorce and the settlement but he never answered again.
I moved to Daytona in June of 2004.I gave the children my address and hoped for the best within a few months the sheriff was at my door again serving me with papers for support. this time I called and tried to talk to him and explained I have no money and its more important for the children to have a relationship with me. I am there mother and want to be a part of there life .he told me I have no right to my children that the court took my! rights away.
That Lori is there mother and she will make all the decisions concerning my children. I told him I am there mother and he has kept me away too long. he told me that I owed him for tools that where in the basement I told him he broke into the home two days after I left and I had no idea what happen to his tools they where in the basement. he wasn't concerned about talking about the children just his things and I told him after about thirty minutes of his none stop ranting that I called to talk to him about the girls not his belongings. I was told he will keep me away from them and I will never see them again they hate me and he has told them how crazy I am and how I don't want anything to do with them. I asked him how he can hurt these children like this .his response was he nots hurting them he's in charge and it will be his way and there is no talking I have no legal right to the children. I told him I didn't want to fight with him I just want a relationship with ! my children. that we don't have to be enemies for I did nothing wrong and he must stop this for the sake of the children. he finally said he didn't care if I gave him twenty dollars a week. I told him I wanted to talk to the girls on the phone. he told me to call on Saturday.
PHONE CALLS TO GIRLS
Sept 17 2004 -
Spoke with Albert regarding support Hearing He told me that he did not care if it was 20 dollars a week as long as I paid something. I explained my financial hardships and his unwillingness to work with me with the girls. I told him I wanted to speak with my children, that I would call Saturday morning. He told me they are not available.
Sept 20 2004 -
Spoke with Albert again to confirm agreement for 20 wkly. He told me he was waiting to hear from his caseworker about this. I tried to explain to him how its not healthy for the children not to have a relationship with me and how this was only suppose to be a temporary arrangement and I will be apart of their lives. He told me I could speak with them on sat 9/25/2005, that I should call the store. Told him I will call at 10:00 am.
Sept 25 2004 -
I called the store at 10:00 am. He then proceeded to tell me about things he was missing. I explained to him that I had no idea where his stuff was because Mary was taking care of storing my belongings and was told to leave his tools alone. If he was missing anything, he should speak with her. He also made me aware that he got most of the stuff from Mary. I also told him that he broke the door in on Feb 3rd and changed all the locks so I could not re enter and took the cable box and anything else that was still in the home. I also told him that he must return the box to the cable company. He said I would have to prove that he has it He also told me “I told you that you would be homeless and penniless as you can see I meant it”. He went on for approx 30 minutes about how he will not pay any bills because they are in my name and he owes me nothing. He also told me that he would take what he can from me and I cannot stop him, because I cannot afford to stop it and as long as he! keeps me in this position, he wins. I told him that once he gets over his guilt of adultery maybe then he would stop projecting his anger at me. He went on and on about how everything is his and I am not getting anything from him. I told him I did not call to talk about his issues but to speak with my children. We can be friends for the sake of the girls. I do not want to argue. Then he finally told me the girls where not there but at home and I should call there. I said I hope we can be friends because I do not want to call and argue just speak with my girls.
Sept 25 2004 -
I called the girls at his girlfriend’s home. She answered and put me on speakerphone before putting the girls on. I spoke with both of them. I told them I loved them and missed them. They told me the same. I promised the both of them I would call every Saturday morning at 10:00 am. The girls said yes they would like that and they would be there for my call.
Oct 2 2004-
I called Ardella and Brandy at 10:00 am at the girlfriend’s house. I got the answering machine so I left a message telling the girls I called as I promised and would call next week at the same time.
Oct 2 2004-
I called the store Albert answered and I asked why the girls where not there for my call, I had told them I would be calling today. He told me Ardella was in New York and Lori (his girlfriend) took Brandy to her sister’s house. I informed him that the girls want to speak with me. He told me I have no legal right to the children. I told him I would call back next week.
Oct 9 2004 -
I called at 10:00 am to speak with the girls .I got answering machine again so I left a message addressed to the girls telling them I called and will call next week at the same time.
Oct 9 2004-
I called the store to find out where the girls were. I got answering machine there also, so I left a message “I said I will be calling the girls again next week at 10:00 am like agreed with children”.
Oct 16 2004 -
I called at 10:00 am. Lori (his girlfriend) answered. I finally spoke with Brandy. I wished her a happy birthday and told her I love and miss her. I asked where she was the last two weeks. She told me that on 10/2 she had to go with Lori and missed talking with me. On 10/9 her father took her them camping. We talked for a while she told me she wishes I was there with her. She said this very low because she is on the speakerphone. Brandy also spoke about her friends and school. I asked to speak with Ardella but Brandy said she was not there. I told Brandy that I loved her and to tell Ardella I love her and miss them both and I will call next week.
Oct 23 2004-
I called at 10:00 am. Lori told me Brandy was not there. I spoke with Ardella . She spoke about school and being in the band. She told me Brandy was over a girlfriend’s house and she was going to dad’s store. I told her I love her and to tell Brandy I called and tell her I love them and miss them both very much. Told Ardella I will call next week.
Oct 30 2004-
I called Ardella and Brandy At 10:00 am .I was put on speakerphone by Lori. I spoke with Brandy. She told me how her costume for Halloween was a hillbilly and that she would be going trick or treating. She told me she did not want to go to school there next year because she will be going to a new school (annex I assumed). I told her she has nothing to worry about all her old friends will be there with her. Brandy told me she wants to see me. I told her I want to see her and maybe soon we can see each other. Ardella was not there so I told Brandy I loved them both and to tell ardella I called. Brandy told me she loved and missed me. I told her I love and miss her too. I told her I would talk to her next week.
Nov 6 2004 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy; she told me that she is sick. We talked about school for a little bit. I told her I love and miss her. I spoke with Ardella she told me about school and playing her instrument in the band at school. I told her I love her and miss her and will talk with them again next week.
Nov 13 2004-
I called the girls at 10:00 am I was told by Lori that the girls were unavailable.
Nov 20 2004-
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy. She spoke about school and things she was doing. She told me about her trip to Maryland. She seemed very quiet and careful about what she was saying. I asked for Ardella but Brandy said she was sleeping. I told Brandy to tell her I love her and miss her. I asked Brandy to send pictures. She said she would. I told her I loved her and missed her and I will talk to her next week.
Nov 27 2004 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. Lori answered and told me they were not there. Asked where they were but got no response.
Dec 3 2004 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy, she told me it was cold there and we talked about a little general stuff. She told me she loved and missed me. I told her I love and miss her too. She told me her father said she could take piano lessons after the New Year. I told her that was good and I hope she will enjoy that. She sounded happy about it. I asked for Ardella but she would not come to the phone said she was tired and laying down. I told Brandy to tell her I love her and miss them both and I will talk to them next week.
Dec 11 2004 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. Lori told me that they were not there.
Dec 11 2004 -
I called the store. Albert answered; I asked if the girls were there. He told me no. I asked where they were. His answer was; it is none of my business. I told him they are my children and I promised them I would call every week. He told me I have no legal right to the children and I will never get them back. I did not see where this call was doing any good so I asked him to come to an agreement on the support. He told me I have a legal responsibility to support them. I told him I have a legal responsibility to be there mother. He told me there mother is with them and I will never get them back. I hung up.
Dec 18 2004 -
I called girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy. She talked about school, her grades, and that she was doing really well. She went on to tell me that where she is living none of her friends are not around and she does not like the weekends because she has nothing to do there. She did not sound happy at all. Ardella was sleeping again so I told her to tell her I love her and miss her. Told brandy I love and miss her and will talk with her next week.
Dec 25 2004 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I wished them both a very merry Christmas and told them I will call again next week.
Jan 1 2005 -
I called at 10:00 am. Albert answered and said they were both in bed sleeping. I told him to tell them I called and will call next week.
Jan 8 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I talked with Brandy. She told me about her Christmas vacation and Ardella’s birthday party and New Years Eve party they had at the house. We talked about school and her grades. I told her as long as she does her best no one could ask for more. She told me that on Saturdays she cleans her room. I asked for Ardella but she said she was upstairs sleeping. I told Brandy to tell her I love and miss her and” hopefully “next week she will be up so I can talk with her. I told Brandy that I love and miss her and will talk to her next week.
Jan 15 2005 -
I called girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy. We talked about when she was younger and her about memories of things we did together then. She was happy talking about these things. She told me she was going to the youth group at the church we use to go to together but they not taken there any longer on Sundays. She told me she would be getting her report card on the 31st. I told her that she probably did great. I asked her about her friends and she told me she has not been able to be with them for a while she also said there is nothing to do there. I asked for Ardella but she said she was sleeping. I told her I love her and we started playing “I love you more” and she laughed. I told her that even though I am not there nothing has changed and I still love her with all my heart. She told me she still loved me with all her heart too. She told me about her scrapbook where she looks at the pictures she has of all of us. I told her that was good and they are good memories to ha! ve. I told her to tell Ardella I love and miss her and will call again next week.
Jan 22 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I talked with Brandy about school. She told me it was snowing and that they could get about a foot before it stops. She talked about her best friend Kendra that she has known since she was 4 yrs old. I told her I was very glad she still has Kendra as her best friend. She talked about things the two of them did together when they were younger. I asked for Ardella but she was in bed sleeping. I told her to tell Ardella I love and miss her. I told Brandy I love and miss her and will talk to her next week.
Jan 29 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. Lori told me the girls were not there.
Feb 5 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. Lori said they were not available to take calls.
Feb 12 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy. She was not talkative like usual. It was very brief she said there was nothing new. She seemed very uneasy and cautious. I spoke with Ardella and the same very quiet and non-talkative. I told them I loved them and will call next week.
Feb 19 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. Lori told me the girls were unavailable.
Feb 26 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. Lori told me they were not available.
March 5 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy she was upset and Lori was yelling in the background “ask her why she Left”. Brandy then asked (I could tell she was crying) why did you leave. I told her when she is ready she can come here sit down with me and I will tell her everything she needs to know. By that time, Lori got on the phone yelling at me to tell her. I told Lori that I call to talk to my children not her. She called me a liar. I told her to leave me alone she has no idea what went on in my home. She said she knows everything. She called me a lousy bitch. Therefore, I told her she was a home wrecker and a slut. I should not have but I did. She made remarks about me being a lousy mother and I told her she could never be a mother to my children because I will always be there mother. She told me that she is there mother. I told her she will never be there mother and they are my children. I told her again I do not call to talk to her but to my children. Lori p! ut Ardella on and she told me she does not want to talk to me when I call. I could tell she was upset. Brandy got on now I could hear her crying. She told me she loved me. I asked her if she wanted me to keep calling. She said yes that she loves me and wants to talk to me (she was crying while saying this to me). At this point, I thought it best to end the call. I told brandy that I love her and will talk to her next week. I do not know what that woman is trying to do but I refuse to be a part of her little games especially with my children. I felt Ardella and Brandy are being used and that is just not fair to them. I do not want them to be hurt like that.
March 11 2005 -
I called girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy; she also spoke about her project in school and how her partner for this was a bad boy in her class she was also telling about the bad kids in her class and how it bothers her. She asked me if I was mad at her because of last week. I explained to her that I was not mad and when she is ready she can come to Florida and we can sit and talk about everything and I can then show her all the legal papers So she can understand everything and make her own decision and judgment when she has all the facts. I also told her that I call to speak with her about what is going on in her life and how she is doing. I do not call to argue with anyone. I told her it is ok that Ardella do not want to talk to me and maybe in time that will change. I told her to tell Ardella that I love her and miss her. I told Brandy I love and miss her and will talk to her next week.
March 19 2005 -
I called girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy. She told me that she has a cold. We talked about school and a few other things. I told her to tell Ardella that I love her and miss her. She was not feeling well so I told her I love her and miss her and will talk to her next week.
March 26 2005 -
I called girls at 10:00 am. Lori told me Brandy was not there.
April 2 2005 -
I called girls at 10:00 am. I got the answering machine, so I left a message for Brandy telling he I loved her and that I will call next week.
April 9 2005 -
I called girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy. She told me she made high honors on her report card. I told her I knew she could do it because she is smart. I asked her where she was the last couple of weeks. She told me that two weeks ago, she was at Laura’s house and Last week she had to go with Lori to her daycare center to help put in carpet. She also said this week she has to wash Lori’s car. I told her I loved her and missed her and to tell Ardella I love and miss her too. She told me she loves and misses me.
April 16 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. Lori told me that brandy was unavailable.
April 23 2005-
I called the girls at 10:00 am. Lori again told me that she was unavailable.
April 30 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy I asked her where she was the last couple of weeks. She told me that they took her camping and she was at Laura’s house. I told her that when she is not there I leave a message on the answering machine so she will know I called when she is not there. She spoke about being in the band, softball and her first practice, her friends, and upcoming events. I told her I love her and miss her and to tell Ardella I love and miss her too. I told her I would call next week.
May 7 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I spoke with Brandy. She spoke about softball practice and her first game on Monday night. She told me she was doing well in school. She seemed happy today. I asked about Ardella . She told me that Ardella was going on a trip to king’s dominion in VA She talked about Kendra and Laura. She told me all about her sunflowers that she was growing and that she would be going on a trip to Washington DC on June 1st. I told her to tell Ardella that I love and miss her very much. I told Brandy I love and miss her too. I told her I would call again next week. She said in a low voice “happy mother’s day I love you”. I said thank you sweetheart.
May 14 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00am. I got the answering machine and left a message telling brandy I loved her and will call again next week.
May 21 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I got the answering machine again and left message for Brandy letting her know I called and will call again next week.
May 28 2005 -
I called the girls, the message on the answering machine was about a job in the paper, and then it said, “Liz, we don’t have time for your five minute phone calls. I recorded this and left a message that I called and that I recorded this message.
June 4 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. Lori told me that Brandy was not allowed to talk to me because her phone privileges have been taken away. I was not going to argue so I hung up.
June 11 2005 -
I called girls at 10:00 am. Lori told me that Brandy was not there. She was laughing and had a high pitch sound like a fire alarm blarring into the phone. (I did not appreciate this and feel she did not like Brandy wishing me a happy mother’s day so this is the punishment). I do not want my children hurt for speaking there feelings to me.
June 18 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. I got the answering machine and left a message for brandy telling her I loved and missed and will call again next week.
June 25 2005 -
I called the girls at 10:00 am. Lori told me that I am not allowed to speak with brandy anymore. I hung up.
This was the last time I called because I do not want my children being hurt emotionally by what this woman is doing to them.
when the hearing for support was held in jan I didn't have legal representation beause I can't afford it.they asked all the usual questions and I spoke to the judge and told her about the drug use and how he sold the house and won't let me know what it amount it sold for was .I told her how he refuses to pay any of the marital bills because he said there all in my name. how I was a partneer in the business and did the day to day activity with the business, that he claimed I was a bigamist and the spousal support was thrown aside. that I felt Iw as supporting the children already by what I was not recieving from him. I also told him I love my children but am refused the right to have anything to do with them or a say in how they are brought up. I also stated that I do not want to support my children . I want my children with me. the case was dismissed and no support awarded to him. they also wanted a financial statement which he would not provide. I received a letter in the mail a few weeks later which I have enclosed below:
I received this letter in the mail. Dated June 1, 2005 I have sent this to you word for word.
Liz, As Albert's wife and current acting mother to the girls, I feel the need to express a few things to you. I am a full time mother to Della and Brandy, and frankly, my opinion concerning their upbringing and well being is more significant than yours. Albert and I share the decision making. I form judgments based on the information I collect from my life experiences, therefore I feel justified in saying the following.
We are doing you a favor by allowing you a phone visit with the girls. you abandoned your children and have no legal visitation ( or custody) from Florida. you know all those court documents and papers you say you have? ... try reading them ! the court order states that Albert has full legal and physical custody of the girls. There are No visitations listed for because you are gone. Albert works on Saturdays so has obviously chosen me as the supervisor for your phone calls so I will monitor every conversation .
I hear everything you say. Albert and I agree this necessary for the girls protection.( because we feel you are demented). You might as well get use to this,because at this point is not about to change. Record the phone calls if you chose; we have nothing to hide or be afraid of. Where's the proof you keep talking about to support your stories? Let's see it ! If you really want to prove your honesty, Why wait ? Show the proof now. Prove everything you're telling the kids. Prove that Albert stole the house from you! Prove that he "took" everything from you ! prove that I wanted your children ! Make some copies of your "papers" and send them here. You know there is no proof of your lies ! I have taken time to show and explain our entire file of court documents to the girls.
We have all our proof : Proof that you abandoned your children and took their money; That you willingly walked away from your house and the responsibilities; That you illegally sold or gave away Albert's belongings; That you stole money from the business and hid invoices; that you fraudulently obtained numerous credit cards by forging Albert's signature, then secretly hid thousands of dollars in purchases on these cards from him. ( we have been legally advised that this warrants charges) Would you like to see our proof ? Maybe it would help you face reality. Of course I wasn't in your home when you and Albert were approaching your separation, but I have a pretty good idea of what went on-After all I had kept in contact with him during some of that time.
I heard some of those stories first hand and current. Also, the girls have since told me there stories. I am aware of what Albert's feeling were for you. I'm also aware of his and your behaviors at this time. I know about things you have done in your past that you continue to lie about today.....Remeber when you punched Albert in the face? Remember when you never told your children where you were moving to? Remember when they asked you questions about their future you told them to shut up? Remember when you had Laura caring for their needs because you couldn't get off the computer and care for your children ? Remember when you brainwashed Brandy into telling her Dad she didn't like me. Remember when you told those two innocent young girls to give me "the finger" whenever they saw me? Remember when you made up the story that I was stalking Brandy at summer camp? Remember when you stole the deposits from the business and left Albert with $6000 of unknown outstanding invoices? (Like I said, you are demented.) you never admit your wrong doings - not even to yourself, the person it would matter most to. You think you can flee for 4 years, abandon your children and suddenly step back into their lives and nothing should have changed. You are such a fool ! This is 2005 ! you don't even know your children anymore. they are no longer 8 and 11.
Della's 15 years old now and she knows when you're lying . Brandy is not an 8 yr old child anymore either. they are both far more intelligent than you believe they are. Brandy doesn't remember " how mean her dad was being" because it never happened; She knows this and so do you . Albert (or I ) never planned to take the kids from you, nor did he steal the house from you; The girls know this also and so do you. Nobody ever made you leave your children, and I certainly never set out to take them . Who do you think is going to believe that ? ! you live in your own little world where the only truth is " Liz's word" and unfortunately for you, "Liz" is the only believer. You need to wake up ! Albert and I talk to these girls regularly about the things that have happened in the past and present and we tell them all of the truth, all of the time .
Your weekly five -minute artificial phone conversations have no bearing on what they believe. I personally talk with the girls about being honest about their feelings in an attempt to teach them that it is ok to express themselves honestly no matter whom it concerns- that includes you and me. Your past is catching up with you and your world is beginning to crash down around you, because you refuse to accept the truth. We do not trust anything you say or do. It's our job as parents to protect our children from potential harm , and we view you as potentially harmful. In case you don't know why we view you as such, here are a few ( just a few) reasons; you've lied to the girls in the past about why you left, about things their father has done, about sending money for their birthday, you continue to lie everytime you are confronted with a question from them, you've stolen there money. you've made up totally fictitious stories about their safety, you falsely accuse Albert and I of all kinds of ridiculous notions, you sneak around the country hiding from your responsibilities, you don't tell your children where you are. for years you don't bother to contact them consistently, you don't think you should financially support them so you hide from and lie to authorities.
I could go on and on. Simply put - you are untrustable in every way and I wouldn't allow these girls time alone wi! th you any more than I would allow them time alone with a stranger. I am protecting them. Sorry if you have a problem with that, but I'm there parent and that is my job. I will do my job as a parent . If I were such a bad person how could you be so willing to leave your children behind knowing they would be with me? You are more of a "nasty women" than I could ever possibly be. When you choose to run away I took your children in, I gave them a home, and I agreed to be involved in their lives full time.I didn't have to do any of this. I did it for Albert and for the girls - not for me, and certainly not for you ! I spent the first few years after your departure giving you the benefit of the doubt and waiting for a chance to form a cooperative relationship with you. I kept trying to explain and excuse your leaving to the girls, Albert, and myself. I was open to the possibility of eventually getting along with you. I was willing to meet you on a collaborative level, but you were so belligerent it was hopeless.
I continued to wait for some kind of change from you. (stoplyingand/or become cooperative), but I have since learned different and have given up the wait. You! are an evil, vindictive, cold-hearted women. You've spent your life mastering those traits and you have them polished them to perfection so you can manipulate everyone around you - husbands, in laws, children, and friends,etc. But you've never dealt with Lori Dobson. I won't let you get away with it like your past associates have. You have no idea how your circumstances have changed in the last four years or exactly where you stand now. Your information is seriously outdated because you have spent the last four years running instead of facing the facts. Do you think things have remained the same as they were in 2001 when you left? - four years have gone by ! you cannot be that stupid ! Allow me to enlighten you : you have no assets left from your life with Albert, you alone are still tens of thousands of dollars in debt and creditors are looking for you- and only you, you are no longer married, Law enforcement officials are looking for you in a few states, and you are in arrears for child support since may 2002. These are the facts . Face Them !
I am more of a mother to these girls than you are. I understand you gave birth to them and feel justified in calling yourself mother. I agree. but sincere mother is much more. That's where I come in. Like I have told you in a previous letter, I do everything a mother should do for these girls. So you need to understand that although I have not given birth to these girls. I am a sincere mother to them. I'm sorry if this statement hurts you, but you created its truth when you chose to desert your children leaving them behind with Albert and me. Discarding your children may be normal and/or excusable where you come from, but in my family it is wrong. and thanks to Albert and me the girls will be raised to know this is not normal motherly behavior. Now, I am here to help Albert by doing what's right. I'll make sure the girls always know that you are their" birth mother" and what you have done for them. I do not intend on trying to replace you- I couldn't , I don't have what it takes to do that! However, I have already taken your place. I am where you should have been. I have already I have already spent half as much time raising these girls as you have and I don't intend to stop now. I am here doing what needs to done for these children- being their caregiver and role model. That's a mothers job. That's my job. you have made your choice- a detrimental one- and however you choose to utilize your motherly instincts( if you have any) from this point on is your business.
But I am here to finish the job I started. I made a commitment to be part of these children's lives and I plan to stick with it.I don't intend to desert stepchildren and run from my responsibilities. unlike you I am a devoted parent. I am truly sorry for the things I have done to you and the children. I have apologized for my part in the destruction of your family and mine. in fact, I made apologies to everyone in my life( my children, My ex-husband, parents, siblings ,in-laws, and others.) including myself. I did this so I could move forward . I have spent the last five years progressing and improving my life for then. It has been a long journey , but I have moved far beyond that point of my life, and I am able to hold my head up.
You need to stop blaming others and take responsibility for your actions. and the choices you made in your life. You spent years ruining these children( and Albert for that matter) long before I was ever in the picture. They were so scared , confused, needy and insecure when I met them- because of you! They may not realize it yet, but quite frankly, getting away from you is probably one of the most advantageous things that ever happen to them in terms of becoming the best they can be. Albert and I are working together to help the girls grow in a more positive direction- to become confident, responsible and independent. over the last four years I have tried to understand, explain, excuse, and tolerate your behavior, but now I am through.
I will not allow you to make fools out of these children anymore, nor am I going to let you do any harm to them . Our goal is to raise healthy, responsible, and well adjusted children, and at this point you are not a big part of the equation. Presently you may continue to call here on Saturdays; honestly. We are currently willing to tolerate it for the girls sake. But as you know, If you start trouble for either of them ( mainly Brandy since Della chooses not to speak with you at this point.) we will terminate the phone calls as we see fit. And in the future if we feel your calls are becoming detrimental to their health( emotionally or physiologically) we will put a stop to them altogether. Again, for their protection !
You can attempt to form your own " physco support group " by calling Denise ( or anyone else) and dragging her into the mix by crying about things I say and do to you. I don't trust either of you. nor am I intimidated by you. Trust me, I know your game and I don't play it. I am doing what's right and I don't care what others think. you couldn't find some integrity within yourself if you where offered money for it. You are a liar ! You are a thief ! And a deadbeat ! I expect an am prepared for more confrontations with you.
Sincerely, Lori( his Girlfriend/Wife)
next correspondence was the letter from the court in Pennsylvania telling me there is a hearing on dec 21st @ 3:15pm and I ca do this by phone conference. I cannot get a lawyer to help because of living in fl and the case in pa. I have no money for a good attorney as they all want thousands up front.
Children/Birth Date: Sister
Date Separated: n/a
My family was destroyed by Politics and Corruption. The Chief Justice of the Supreme Court Raped & Impregnated my 12 year old sister and covered-up is entire 38 year career. I have a second web site now with 69,000 visitors and my first site in 2000, had 82,350 visits, still no justice. Visit us at http://maxpages.com/sexualabuse and sign our guest book with support and e-mail our Prime Minister at firstname.lastname@example.org and our Premier at email@example.com
When the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court is the criminal who did this to my family, where can I get Justice. My family has been destroyed by Corruption, we're left without even basic human rights. When the Government & Legal system are the Organized CRIME in CANADA, they honor CHILD RAPIST. The Federal Government is allowing the Credibility & Reputation of the Police & The Legal System, to be destroyed to protect ONE Corrupt Lawyer, Politician, Judge, Child Rapist & now member of THE ORDER OF CANADA .This man has broken every law he swore to protect. Because this X-Justice Minister and Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, raped and impregnated my 12 year old sister, and covered it up his entire career, no one will help us. To this day, no lawyer will represent me and the legal system will do nothing to help. The last lawyer I asked to represent me, told me, if any lawyer tried to represent you, it would mean the end of their career.
Children/Birth Date: Brieanne, June 17, 1985
Date Separated: Dec 28, 1994
My x & I were divorced in 1987. Breianne was then 1& 1/2 years of age. Her Father & I were only married for 4 horrible years. Upon our divorce I was granted temporary custody, and then again when the divorce was final I was awarded full physical custody and my x regular visitation.
Visitations were erratic at best. My x was always busy with his own personal life.Durring the early time of this he brought Brieanne ( still a little one in diapers) home late one evening. I always gave her a bath before "night-night" so she would be more relaxed & sleep better. This particular night when I undresed her I saw what appeared to be a very red square shaped rash on her diaper area. Considering that she had not had her diaper changed since I did it before she left on visitation I assumed it was due to her wet diaper, and that a bath & diaper rash oinment would have it cleared up by morning. It didn't.
Upon seeing this I called her Father at work & asked him to take her to her Doctor with me. Of course her fathers normal reaction was defnsive & aggrivated, because he assumed I was accusing him of doing "something" to Breianne.This is 1986.
In 1987 I met a wonderful man & we began seeing each other. My main concern was how Brieanne would do with this new relationship in my life. I am happy to say that to this day Brieanne & her step Father (my Husband of 12 years) share a wonderful friendship. David & I were married in February of 1987, and were expecting a baby in 1988. David & I always made sure that at every oportunity she would see her Father and that she was a very impotant part of David & I.
June 1988, I went into premature labor again & was rushed to the hospital. I ended up staying for about 4 days again. The afternoon I was released my Husband came to get me. I was put on full restrictions. No cooking, no cleaning ect, just bed rest. Brieanne was with her Father on visitation that day. David & I were sitting at the dinner table when my x brought Brieanne home. Keep in mind she is only 3 years old at this time. David went to the door, Brieanne was in tears & her father just drove off leaving her on the porch. When David brought her in she began to hit & cry & push away, for no apparent reason.David & just backed off to give her space & to observe. Brieanne kept repeating this odd little ryhme about "tweezers in my butt". After many hours of calming & comforting she gave us bits & pieces about her uncle ( my x's brother) touching her with tweezers, and showing us where by pointing to her privates.We called the police.
They belived what was being told to them & we were taken to the hospital for her to be examined. Upon examination by the trauma nurses , they stated that even thought there was no physical damage, they believed that something did happen to her because of her emotional state. I went into full labor.
July 1988, David & I had our baby boy. August 1988 a motion of protective orders were put into place. The uncle was not allowed to have contact with Brieanne at anytime without the presence of another adult. The very evening that I received the order I got a call from my x, he stated "I was there when my brother did that to Breianne, I saw it happen, but I am not going to hate my brother for doing that to her because blood is thicker than water." Sick.
January 1990, my x decided to move to California. He and his second wife had split up & she had taken thier Daughter Amber back to Michigan.He never called Brieanne here at my house after that & he quit paying child support. This is supported by his Aunt & Uncle that live in California. But visitaitons continued with my x's mom who lives near us . Supposedly he maintained contact with Brieanne by calling while she was with his mom.Upon the return after a visitation I saw his mom drive into my driveway with Brieanne sitting in the front seat of her car on the uncle's lap. I called his mom & told her that was a direct violation of the court order & that there wouldn't be anymore visitations. His mom petitioned for grandparent intervenor visits. Durring the hearing it was brought up that she was concealing my x's whereabouts, she belligerently said she wasn't. When she was asked then for his info she refused right in front of the judge. Yet she was granted visitations.
1991, grandparent visitations continued despite withholding of my x's whereabouts. And a new & very ugly aspect became apparent in Brieanne. When she would return from each visit she would say the ugliest & meanest things to Dave & I about us & about her handicapped brother. "My name is Gibson period, Mom what does period mean?" " Nick is stupid he isn't even my brother he is only my half brother. You are not my mom, grandma D is more like my mom." Daddy David isnt my daddy, he is my s-t-e-p daddy." She spelled out step. I still posess written proof of my x's mom forcing Brieanne to say these things, my x's mom wrote letters to one of Brieannes therapists admitting this.
June 1992, the beginning of the worst. My x called for the first time in 18 months for Brieanne's birthday. He stated he was comming to see her. I told him that because of the situation I was uncertain & that I needed his address & proof of it & his telephone #. He refused. I filled a motion of reasonable fear, faliure to pay child support & abandonment. The magistrate ordered an evaluation surronding Brieannes difficulties with visitation.
The outcome of a $4000.00 evaluation done under force & duress, was that Brieanne needed therapy & that I was "distorted." Which was translated into I couldn't tell reality from non reality due to me dealing with to much stress, ie: the courts, the evaluators, the cost, and being the parent of a handicapped child. According to the therapist I made up the hideouse stories about what had happend to Brieanne in the past. I was ordered into therapy.
Brieannes Father & his mom picked Brieanne's therapist.She had therapy with this woman for a year. I participated, when asked to & even when not asked. But after the fact we found out that my x's mom manipulated the therapist, ( I still have tangible proof of this,)though pressures from herself & her attorney. During this time my x began living with a woman & her 3 sons and was doing well convincing all involved of there "happy" family life & that him & this woman were married. Brieanne began visitations in California with him.
1993 & 1994. There was to be a follow up evaluation in the fall of 1994. I was advised I could request a guardian adlitem & new evaluators due to the "realtionship" between the first evaluators & my x's attorney that was discoverd. When I motioned for this I was also received a motion for change of custody. This was in the summer of 1994. Brieanne was at the time in California through the summer.
August of 1994. I received a call from my x's live in. She told me that a week ago she discoverd her oldest son (14) sexually molesting Brieanne. The change of custody hearing is set for December. My x informs me that he involved social services & a therapist during this phone call from his girlfriend. I learn that he is wrong for not informing me prior to treatment. After all at this time I am still the custodial parent. Brieanne is sent home immediately. I attempted to contact her therapist, who has now let her licensce lapse & moved to California. I am advised to lay off the therapy, because it is felt ( by a professional) that she has been over therapied.
December 1994, Christmas, the hearing for custody began. A 3 day nightmare. The new evaluator which had only met with us 3 times swear I am abusing Brieann through PAS & physical neglect based upon the testimony of my x & his mom. Brieanne's 6th grade teacher who is a trained child psychologist testifies to the contrary as does her doctor who cared for her for at least 5 years. The evaluators admit they could be wrong. This falls on the deaf ears of the Judge. The judge who is handling our case is well known to be a Father's right activist. Judge Baylin had an interview in a news paper wich exposed this.
The social sevices therapist from California testified by phone, what she said was fairly predictable. But upon listening to this testimony from California the evaluator's decide to use this. They persuaded the Judge that the only way Brieanne could have allowed this "victimazation" to happen was because of me. That I kept her from her father for 18 months & made her so desperate to see him that she would do anything. We were then dissmissed so the judge could make her ruling. For some unknown reason Dave & I still vividly remember the fact that the evaluators always sat with my x & his mom & their attorney.
When we were called back in I was told by the jugde that Brieanne was going to live iwth her father because, I am distorted if I can create the kind of desperation in Brieanne that the evals spoke of & that I couldnt possibly be a fit mother for Brieanne with all the extra work I have with my handicapped son.
Upon hearing that my x's mom stood up and loudly announced that she still wanted visitaiton rights. Of couse that was denied. Never once was my son & daughter's relationship taken into consideration, never once durring the whole trail was any evidence provided to support the accusations of neglect & abuse from my x & his mom, or in support of the valuators.I didn't even have a jury trial. Never once was there any question as to my x dissapearing for over a year. In the state of Colorado that is abandonment. Never once did they even look at the relationship between my x, Brieanne & his mom. The judge & evaluators bought what they accused me of & said I did as fact without proof.
Never was their relationship with Brieanne seen in any other light than a "wonderfull" family.Yet my Daughter still lives with him despite the numerous women that move in & out of the apartment. Despite the fact that my x still has an anger managment problem & uses Brieanne as his target for his anger. Judge Baylin thinks he is just such a wonderful man. How am I ever going to explain this to Brieanne's little Brother, they spent six years together as siblings & even though he is mildly autisic & hearing impaired he isn't dumb. He still shows signs of emotional trauma over this. He gets totally "freaked out" everytime I go somewhere without him. It took a long time & a lot of effort on our part to make him feel safe again.He still to this day doesn't deal with Breianne leaving very well & it is so very heartbreaking for us.
Children/Birth Date: Adjani Katarina Hernandez-Nicholson, April 1990
Date Separated: Mother's Day, 1997
Trying to "enforce Final Mandate Appeals Court." This case was, Reversed and Remanded, due to Appeals Court findings of "gross Violations of due process and Abuse of discretion by Judge."
Currently denied Court access via ILLEGAL GAG Order by Judge that I can't file Motions or make a Plea of help as a violence victim or he will imprison me with sanctions. JUDGE REFUSES TO REMOVE HIMSELF FROM MY CASE OR RENDER RELIEF. I am in dire hardship of a new Lawyer for Affirmative action against this Judge, for parental and survival rights.
Same exact situation as Elian cuban boy, except paradox; taken illegal custody of by florida locked in with the Perpetrator a Violation of the Freedom Movement Act. zmy daughter is a US citizen, I am a law abiding tax payor denied due process which gravely violated my Constituional rights.
I was denied my Parental rights in Official Oppression since, Mother's Day 1997....when 9 Police with guns, handcuffs, ramsacked my home, with NO-Knock warrant. No Miranda rights no notice to me. They iillegally and forceably abducted my 7 year old little girl Adjani who was in sheer terror and screaming for her, Mommy. "NEVER APART SINCE BIRTH" Horrified neighbors watched this screaming and grave injustice.
t is INCOMPREHENSIBLE. I held active Court Order of Protection against my husband's violence. Since then, my child's been held 100% hostage in serious Psychological Parental Alienation by the father with an "established abuse history" with us based on Chicago & Florida Court facts, ER, 911.
Witnesses all substantiated the facts which were ignored by Broward county lower trial family Judge Lawrence Korda. For every plea of help of me for my child, the Judge retaliates "double" with Sanctions to the Petitioner wife. Made to pay $1,200 Alimony/ child support to Batterer STILL, I HAVE YET TO HEAR MY BELOVED CHILDS VOICE AND SHE MY PRECIOUS LITTLE GIRL I am anguished, for her safety & welfare as a parent.
Worldwide my airline colleauges, neighbors, family and friends have written hundreds of appeals for JUSTICE FOR ADJANI. To to the Governor, Senator, and President with an absolutely NO RESPONSE FROM THE STATE OF FLORIDA ABOUT MY CHILDS WELL BEING UP TO DATE!! I have been found guilty of NO OFFENSE. I am law abiding with impeccable history.
The Judge makes it so impossible for every lawyer I hire to fight for my rights that they quit. All relief has been given to the Respondent abuser since day One, and I the disabled wife made to pay for his life although he earns $50,000 a year and wife total income is, $11,760 Social security disability garnished.
SELECTIVE JUSTICE? HOW CAN THE GUSTAPO COME AND BREAK INTO YOUR HOME AND ILLEGALLY ABDUCT YOUR CHILD WHILE HOLDING ORDER OF PROTECTION AGAINST VIOLENCE, in USA? ' I SUGGEST A HIDDEN AGENDA, VESTED INTEREST ON JUDGE PART WITH THIS PETITIONER'...WHY WOULD A JUDGE DO THIS TO AN INNOCENT LITTLE CHILD?
A Childs best interest is best served when the U.S.A RESPECTS A CHILDS BASIC UNIVERSAL BIRTHRIGHT, TO BE LOVED BY BOTH THEIR MOTHER AND FATHER EQUALLY"..not brutal invasion tearing families apart.
What inhuman inmoral message are these courts giving our children inflicting upon them such Cruel Child Abuse, and Applauding the Perpetrators abuse? WAIVER EMPOWERS ABUSE. Please help Stop the Violence, help Protect the Children. AS PARENT WE MUST UNITED TO BE OUR CHILDRENS VOICES THAT ARE BEING, KEPT SILENT IN OPPRESIVE VIOLENCE! WE ARE OPEN TO ANY HELPFUL FEEDBACK OR IDEAS, gracias. SEE JUSTICE FOR ADJANI WEBSITE FACTS A MOTHERS DAY worst FEAR and A CHILDS worst NIGHTMARE (help) http://expage.com/page/justice2adjani
Together We Can Stop Abuse, Mrs.Sila & Adjani Mother&Child Seeking Equal
Justice, illegal Prisoners
Children/Birth Date: William(DOB) 1991
Date Separated: May, 2 1992
Yes, I will go to Court on 10/04/99 I ran awy to Canada with my twin sons William and Michael. Their father, never bothering to marry me, decided that I should have 2 hours per week with them and they were only 6 months old. He abused me when I was pregnant and he threatened me with guns. He is wealthy so guess who wins. I am a social worker for children with Los Angeles County. I have worked there for 13 years, however, I have only had monitored visits for no reason for eight years. My sons are almost as big as I am. I am paying more than guideline child support to this man who is a multimilionaire and I routinely have my utilities shut off because I can't keep up with my bills. Recently the children were told by their father that they should get me to hit someone or kiss a woman so he could deem me as unfit (i.e. a violent lesbian I suppose) The children's older brother, a child by this man's previous marriage committed suicide. His remaining son from this marriage is psychotic.
My chidren have been kicked by this son (age 30) addditionally, the
children's father's girlfriend was tested out on the Rorshach/MMPI as psychotic/borderline
and sociopathic. However, since money is not on my side my children are living in a
situation that is abberant and unsafe while I rescue children from other families and am
unable to see my children for more that 24 hours per month. THIS IS JUSTICE?
Update (12/22/99) - I have the Pepper-Slone case. I just
went to Court at 111 N. Hill St. Los Angeles, CA 90016 on an OSC to change to joint
custody/no monitoring (after 8 years, please) and to quit paying child support to the
multi-millonaire (paying above legal child support) and to get my children to come and
stay with me. They are living with more than one schizophrenic, sociopath and a
controlling, non-empathic father. I am sorry to say my children are in this condition.
Further more, because of my children's father's girlfriend (schizophrenic/sociopath) they
are not allowed to drink milk because she has hallucinated hives and caused them
gastrointestinal distress hours after drinking milk. I am praying to G-d that there will
be a miracle and that my twin boys will be returned to me. I love them.
Children/Birth Date: Joseph (DOB) August 25, 1984
My wife and I separated November 2, 1995. Just before Christmas we had a court hearing. My wife didn't want me to have time with my children during the holidays. During the court hearing the judge decided that until a permanant property and custody agreement was reached that neither my wife nor I could remove items from the home we had shared for almost ten years. I was also allowed visitation over the holidays. My wife remained in the home with the children and I moved in with my parents who live approx 10 miles away. I saw my children almost on a daily basis for the first three months of 1996. I called my wife on the last Friday in March 1996 to let her know I would be picking the children up on Saturday morning. When I arrived at the house on Saturday morning, it was emtpy. I do mean empty. The children were not there. My wife was not there. There was not a stick of furniture or a picture on the wall. On the wall a note was taped that said "I have what I want, you can have the rest".
I had no idea where my children were. I went to their school to find out if they had been advised that the children wouldn't be in school. I was told by the school staff that my wife asked them not to divulge any information to me because she feared for their safety. I was told I'd need a court order. I went to court and the judge compelled the school to release the information. My children had been taken from New Jersey by their mother to California. The judge in charge of our divorce case issued a warrant for her arrest (which to this day has not been served). He also stopped the child support payments and issued an order which compelled her to return the children to New Jersey. The California courts made NO attempt to locate them let alone serve the warrant. During the next two years I had next to no contact with my children.
During this time I had a heart attack and then a angioplasty. Because of the disability child support was cut. I returned to work in mid 1998 and child support was reinstated. Still, though I had NO contact with my children. Each time my wife disobeys a court order she is threatened with dire consequences but there is never a follow through. At this point in time, she is supposed to bring the children to the court house for visitation each Monday afternoon from 4 - 5 PM. She brought them the first week. She didn't get there until 4:15 but the end was still 5 PM. Time doesn't get added for her tardiness. The next three weeks she called the probation person handling our case and told her the children were sick and couldn't make the visitation.(that's all 4 children sick three weeks in a row) Probation isn't concerned as long as she makes the phone call. I am at my wits end. It has been almost 4 years since I have had any meaningful contact with my children and I would be grateful for any advice I can receive. I have reems of paper that say I am in the right as far as the court sees, but NO relationship with my kids.
Children/Birth Date: Rebecca Evans/1993
Current Status: Waiting for Court Decision.
The Story: I was in the Persian (Arabian) Gulf serving my seventh year in the United States Navy on the U.S.S..Abraham Lincoln (CVN 72) attached to Fighter Squadron 213 (The Fighting Blacklions). We had left for our six-month deployment in April. Aside from the usual hot hard work of carrier flight operations and having a collision with one of our supply ships the cruise was fairly uneventful until mid August. I received an emergency message to call home. When I called I was informed that Rebecca had fallen into the swimming pool during a party at my Home and that Lori (named changed) was having an affair with her supervisor from work. Lori had moved "Shane" (named changed) into my home with all of his belongings. As soon as I heard this my time limit on the phone was up and it disconnected. Up to this point in my life I had never felt such a feeling. My entire world was completely turn upside down and had almost no ability to contact anyone who could help me get it back together. Everything that I believed in, worked and lived for was gone. I didn't know what Rebecca's condition was.
Why my wife of 4 years had betrayed the complete and utter devotion and trust that I had given her. I went "nuts". I practically flew up the five stories to where my shop was on the ship slamming every door that I could. When I got there I told my supervisor that he had 24 hours to get me off this ship and headed home. (Like I had some kind of choice). It felt like the world underneath me had suddenly given out and I was falling into some kind of black hole that I couldn't get out of. *** Classified*** the next 6 weeks on the carrier ***Classified*** I felt as though everything in my life was gone in a flash. I can't explain how devastated I was. I can tell you that when I did get sleep it was unrest full and that I dreamed of Lori treating Rebecca as though she were some kind of possession that she didn't care about and wanted to get rid of.
To get the complete and current story, please go to their website at: http://www.icnet.net/users/thesaint/
Children/Birth Date: Domenic (Feb 1993).
Current Status: Denied relief in several appeals on Issue of Jury Trial (including US
Supreme Court), read details here.
Most recent "bad
news" was the relocation of Domenic to California
in 1998 when he was 5.
Experienced a real child support disaster due to
choosing to visit my remote son as a first priority (my former spouse comes
from a very wealthy family and Dom had no material needs). I spent 6 months in jail
in 2000 and then a non-cooperation 'hunger strike'
when jailed again in 2006.
The Whole Story: Everything that's bad about the "system". Being a parent was everything I had dreamed of. Check here for my background. I never would have believed I was considered so "expendable" in my son's life. Before the divorce started, we were both working part time, both equal parents -- but on the very first pretrial motion, I was expendable! Even though I stayed in the house, in a nice neighborhood, and my spouse moved into an apartment
My spouse could afford a lawyer -- I could not (and the Court gave me NO relief), and that made a BIG difference. The way divorces are usually done in New York State is the two lawyers and Judge negotiate it (without the parties present), and if there is an "issue" about the children, well a Law Guardian and maybe a Psychologist make all the necessary inputs. I wanted a jury -- and that was just "unheard of" and a "bad attitude". I was holding up a speedy settlement!
As I thought about this devastation, I just could not believe it. Initially my 'visitation' was very other weekend, from Thursday - Monday (a 4 day weekend) and Dom loved to come see me. In 1998 my former spouse petitioned to move to California, I could not afford an attorney and had an assigned counsel doing his 'first' relocation case -- we lost. I have been ever so thankful that Domenic and I have kept a strong relationship in spite of it all (see Christmas letters for more details). I have struggled at a "child support" level which was set at over twice my actual income and local officials who simply refused to hear a "modification" after my son was relocated. It costs me almost a $1000 to travel with my mother out west to see Domenic for a weekend -- none of that counts.
On appeal, I really had hoped for justice -- all I want is equal time with our child. I tried writing letters, with no effect. I have always enjoyed history & philosophy and was struck by the lives of Martin Luther King and Gandhi. The AKidsRight.Org group is an attempt to use the concept of NonViolent Action as a force for positive change. The keystones are Faith in a loving God, Love for others, and a willingness to make Personal Sacrifice. There is one more Civil Right our nation has to observe and protect -- the right of parents and children to grow together.
I will be calling attention to this by voluntary imprisonment. (See our events page) You can also see some TV news in-jail interviews. This may sound strange, but I felt "free" after making the decision to "willingly" be imprisoned -- I am making a statement for what I believe in. I am now taking "action". I have no illusions about what "justice" is, and it did not happen here. I organized the AKidsRight.Org group to bring Mothers & Fathers together to get our rights protected, click here for our goal & approach to reform.
Children/Birth Date: Samuel (1986), Vivinia(1984)
Date Separated: August 1996
Current Status: A violation of restraining order which has been pending since 4/24/1996. Also I have a Felony Warrant issued on May 24,1999 for child support arrears due to the fact that I lost my job while being out on family medical leave, due to mental and emotional stress caused by this ordeal.
It is my belief that the laws concerning child support, visitation, and custody must be changed to bring about fairness and equality. As they are written and enforced, these laws violate the civil and inalienable human rights of non-custodial parents as well as the rights of children to be guided by both of their mothers and fathers. Following is my own experience with these laws. I implore you to have your staff investigate my case and see for yourself that these laws are notworking.
This person has put together a nice website, check here for details.
Children/Birth Date: Leah (1994), Mariah (1995)
Date Separated: March 1996 (Started web site, http://www.delphi.com/OhioParents)
My husband met his first wife, Allie, (name changed) while he was in the service. She had just graduated high school. She had come to live there with her father because her mother's boyfriend was alcoholic and had abused her and her sister for years. Her mother found out, but chose to stay with the boyfriend, so Allie left. She and my husband got engaged, and within weeks found out they were pregnant. The arrangement was so chaotic, and work was so scarce in their rural community, the young couple made the decision to move to Ohio with my husband's mother. Living with his mother was not much easier as she ran a full time daycare out of her home, but it did give them the chance to save enough money for their own place.
Allie refused to work during her pregnancy, claiming that she had placenta previa and it would kill her and the baby. My husband inquired about this in passing at a doctors appointment, and was shocked to find out the doctor had no clue what he was talking about. This should have been a clue for my husband. Leah (name changed) came into the world in June of 1994. Her mother passed her a strep infection (which was not mandatorily tested for back then) and she was in ICU for the first weeks of her life.
After Leah came home, they decided they debated on trying to get a bigger apartment in a safer neighborhood. When a bullet missed their window by about 4 inches, they became desperate. At the same time, a friend of my husband's from high school resurfaced. His parents had kicked him out and he was temporarily staying with his sister. Knowing the predicament they were in, he proposed he would move in with them until he could save up for his own place, sleep on the couch, and pay half the rent. This way they could afford a better place to live. My husband talked it over with his Allie, and she was surprisingly agreeable to the idea and so it was. A few months later, Allie found out she was pregnant again. My husband was ecstatic but also worried about how they would feed another child. Kyle, (name changed) his friend, had fallen behind on paying his share of the rent. Pete (my husband, name changed,) changed jobs and started taking on overtime, often working 50 to 60 hours a week. He started noticing odd changes in Allie and Kyle. When he came home from a hard day at work, they would be laying on the couch together watching movies, or he would be rubbing her feet. He voiced his suspicions, and she vehemently denied anything was going on.
Pete's long hours finally caught up with him, he developed menigitis, and was hospitalized. Three days into his hospital stay, a nurse came in and started asking him questions. He was confused, why did she need this information? The nurse told him his wife had given birth the day before, two floors down, to a baby girl. He was excited, but furious that she hadn't called him to tell him about it. She hadn't called anyone in his family. Kyle was in the delivery room with her. It was four months later before the inevitable happened. He caught them in bed together. Mariah was screaming in her crib from the next room. He ordered his friend to leave. She apologized and swore it would never happen again. The next day when he got home from work, Kyle was back. She told my husband she was taking the kids to New York to visit her mother, and when she got back she wanted him gone. Devastated and in shock, he did what she asked.
They filed for separation, she got temporary custody, uncontested, and he got visitation. But he didn't get any visitation from her. His mother watched the kids at her day care during the day, and if he was sick from work he would see them, or if he really sped driving home, he might get ten minutes. He asked her about it, and she said that technically, until the divorce was finalized, she had every right to do this, that the existing order was just a "suggestion." of how to split time. I met my husband shortly before the divorce was finalized. I couldn't believe how hard he had it with her. I hated watching him call and ask to see his kids, only to be told they were having a "special day" with Kyle, his ex-friend instead. He would call to talk to them, and Kyle would laugh in his ear and hang up on him.
But he still really believed that after the divorce was finalized things would change. Well, they didn't. We were supposed to have the kids for Halloween, she wouldn't allow it. Thanksgiving, they had to visit her mother out of town, again no show. Christmas we were supposed to have them for three days. We got them for five hours while she was at work. And so it went. When we got engaged, we had to change the date of our wedding, because she said if it was not on one of our weekends, she would not allow them to come. Miraculously, they did come, but right after the honeymoon it started again. Memorial Day, no kids. Father's day, they had to spend with her boyfriend. Yes, they had the chicken pox, but all we asked was a phone call that never came. And it wasn't just the holidays either.
Sometimes we would find letters shoved in our mailbox that said she had taken the kids to New York for the weekend, or the week. Sometimes we wouldn't even know until we found the house empty. When she decided to go back to school, we reworked our visitation schedule so we could watch them the nights she was in school. But she got mad at him over something trivial, and put an end to his midweek visitations entirely for the rest of the month. We thought about hiring an attorney, but we didn't have the money, as I was now pregnant with our son. But we found it, we had to, after Leah began bedwetting. When she did wet the bed, she became terrified. It turns out, one day when Kyle was watching her she was playing outside and wet her pants. She told him, and he said she would have to stay in the wet pants as "punishment" for being a bad girl.
He then marched her into the back yard, and told everyone what she had done, pointing and gesturing to her wet pants, and encouraged her younger sister and her uncle to taunt her to humiliate her into "behaving." Her uncle (the son of the man who abused Allie) actually came up and grabbed her crotch, and told her it "felt icky." My husband called me at work, frantic, asking me what to do. I told him we should first tell the mother, since she was not home, to give her the benefit of the doubt that maybe she did not know this was going on. So he talked to her that afternoon, and she accused him first of making it up, then when she questioned Leah and heard the same story from her, accused him of planting it in her head. That night when we went to pick them up for visitation, they would not come out of the house, instead the boyfriend came out, and told us we could not see them, and there whereabouts were "none of our concern."
We called the police, who ascertained that they were in fact in the house and safe, but we still did not get our visitation. Then she took them to a therapist because she was "concerned about the influence of the father" She refused to give us the name of the therapist until a month into the sessions. She also told the therapist he was not allowed to have any medical info, when it is expressly provided for in his court order. When we finally met the therapist, she had had a month of lies about how vile my husband was. We told her of the incident that happened, and the fact that Kyle spanks the girls, and the visitation problems. She asked the mother who said it was all a lie. She never asked the child. Not once. She determined that my stepdaughter was under severe stress from the visitation problems, and the ensuing arguments. She noted that my husband was a good father, and the girls had good relationship with him.
So after some soul searching we filed for custody, and contempt for the visitation. It took six months to get our hearing, and the magistrate got them to agree to shared parenting, because the psychologist report had not shown clear signs of abuse. The lawyers didn't have time to draw up the papers before she denied him his Christmas vacation. His mom was out of town, so he knew someone was watching he kids, so he went over to get them from the babysitter who turned out to be in seventh grade. The girls were wearing mismatched shorts and T-shirts in the middle of winter, had not been fed all day, and Leah had a raging case of pink eye for which she had recieved no medical treatment, and was obviously in severe discomfort. We called our lawyer that night, and said forget it, we are going for custody. She was so mad over this, she got her lawyer to suspend visitation with us, claiming they had gotten the pink eye while at our house, and that made it unfit. Her lawyer did not go through the family courts to do this. She denied the next three weeks. My husband called and they would not pick up the phone. He left "I love you" messages for the girls to let them know he wasn't absent by choice. She disconnected her answering machine.
Finally our lawyer called her lawyer and threatened to have him disbarred, and then she let us see them again. We went to a judge and got an ex parte hearing for a restraining order, forbidding her from denying him visitation. It didn't stop her. Instead she went to her lawyer and filed a motion to move the girls out of state to her mothers. The same mother who had allowed her to be abused for four years. She listed a bogus address, and a bogus job. She also got a restraining order on my husband claiming he had threatened to kill her, which was a lie. We got a Guardian Ad Litem appointed, and a court psychologist. Allie and Kyle had a huge fight several weeks later in which he threw a chair at her. He was so out of control, she fled to a friends' house for the evening. He trashed her house so bad while she was gone, the landlord started eviction proceedings.
She told Leah and Mariah that if they told the Guardian Ad Litem, they would never see her again. After months of evaluations, the court appointed's determined that yes, she had interfered with visitation, yes Kyle was volatile, (although Allie had him stay with his parents for three weeks so she could convince them he had moved out, which she did, he is now back.). Both experts agreed that they should not move to New York, that the girls had a great relationship with my husband, myself, and our son, that our home was great for kids, and that they should recieve more visitation with my husband, they recommended she retain custody! We were stunned. We have waited since July of 1998 for justice, and protection for our family. It looks to be a long time coming. Meanwhile the girls are stuck in a nightmare they never asked for. We are waiting for our final trial date at the end of the month. As for our Christmas time this year, Allie says she might give it to us. Depends on her plans...
Children/Birth Date: Corrinne (1993)
Date Separated: January 19, 1998
I have been fighting for primary custody back of my daughter since March 1996. My x-husband Mr. Heigert was military, and due to his circumstances needed 6 months a year with my daughter in order to keep housing. I wanted a safe place for my daughter to visit when she went to see her father so I agreed to sign a form granting him primary custody. I told him to sign that he would give me child support during the time I had my daughter so that it would show that the verbal agreement was that I would actually have my daughter during school months and his during summer. Mr. Heigert filed that paperwork in the state of California getting custody by way of uncontested divorce. At the time he was residing in Maryland and myself Georgia. So I immediately went to court in Maryland and recieved a temporary order of custody from the judge there and brought the case to Georgia. During that time my daughter had only been away from me for a few short weeks for visistation with her father.
In August of 1997 he got married and moved to Germany. In January of 1998 I got juristidiction in Chatham County Georgia and we went to court. The judge gave Mr. Heigert temporary custody of my daughter and allowed him to take her out of the country. During her time in Germany I was allowed 1 phone call a week for 10 min. I could only call between 6 and 7 p.m. his time. I followed Mr. Heigerts rule because I had no choice. In May he came back to the states and didn't allow me to speak to my daughter for 25 days. We went back to court for a final hearing June 18, 1998. The judge (Ms. Freesman) heard the case. I was never given the option of a jury trial. I was allowed summer visitation and in August 25, 1998 we finally received the order from Judge Freesman. She gave Primary custody to my x-husband. My daughter cried for 3 days and begged not to return to Germany. Because of my daughters "diffiance" in returning to Germany Mr. Heigert didn't allow her to return for 9 months.
He has broken every court order and again this Christmas he told me to purchase plane tickets for a visititation and then told me that I couldn't have her unless I signed an agreement with him giving up my week-end visistation. I didn't agree to the signing of the agreement even though I don't get my visisation now. He doesn't allow us to talk with her, he throws away gifts we send, he tells my daughter to call me Paula and her step-mother Mommy. We have now hired a psychologist for my daughter for the times she is with us because she complains of physical abuse by her step-mother. She is a very scared, depressed little girl and we can't get a judge in the US to listen to our case. I just keep running into brick walls. I just want my daughter to be safe, secure, and happy. I keep trudging forward because I know if I keep trying I will some how get this back to court and fight for my daughter.
The judicial system needs to change so that people don't have to go through attornies to have a court order followed. If a judge puts forth a court order the judge should see to it that it is followed.
Children/Birth Date: Matthew Duckworth 11/20/96 & Laura Duckworth 12/24/97
Date Separated: November 14, 1998
Current Status: I have filed appeals with the 5th District Court of Appeals in Dallas Texas and also with the Kentucky Court of Appeals.
My story is very bizarre and if I were not living this nightmare, I'm not sure I would believe it. I was living in Kentucky with my three children (Christopher, Matthew, and Laura) whenever my second husband had me served with divorce papers. He was living in Rockwall Texas at the time. We were separated due to his abusing us. There are many persons who can verify the horrible abuse my children and I lived in with my ex-husband. Anyway, he filed for divorce in Rockwall Texas seeking custody of our two children together - then nine months and twenty-one months old.
There was a divorce action already pending in Kentucky which had been filed by my ex-husband when I was pregnant with our last child - Laura. It never occurred to me that he could initiate a new action in another state. However, he filed a voluntary dismissal of the Kentucky action which legally he could not do since I had filed an answer to his divorce petition. Somehow, he managed to pull the whole thing off through his attorneys. We had little money when we were together. In fact, I paid for the birth of Matthew and supported the family during my pregnancy with Matthew. (My ex-husband had trouble keeping a job.) I wondered where he was getting the money for attorneys. I had no job or money at the time I was served with the Texas divorce petition, so I tried to get legal aid. I could not obtain any legal help, so I wrote the judge in Texas a letter and requested a continuance on the hearing that had been set. (There was only a week to prepare for the hearing.) The judge in Texas used my letter as an appearance and had the hearing without me present. She ordered that my babies travel over 1,200 miles (each way) every weekend. They were ordered to live in Kentucky one week and Texas the next. I did not even have a car at this point because the judge had given our only vehicle to my ex-husband. She had granted my ex-husband a restraining order against me.
He got all of our furniture and personal belongings. Everything we owned belonged to me and my son Christopher. Yet, I got nothing - even to this day. I managed to borrow a van and went to Texas after my babies. The visitation continued as ordered for nearly eight weeks. My babies were very ill and bruised every time I picked them up from my ex-husband. I took them to the hospital nearly every time. On October 25, 1998, they were so badly injured that the hospital called the Kentucky State Police and Child Protective Services to the hospital. (I have these records.) Laura had a black eye and Matthew had a skull fracture. I should never have let them go back to Texas, but I was afraid to go against a court order. Looking back now, I should have held on to my babies and never let them go. I had no idea how corrupt the court system was at that time.
When I went to Texas to pick them up for my week of court ordered visitation on November 19, 1998, I was served with a restraining order stating that I could not see my babies without supervision and that they could not be removed from Rockwall County Texas. Of course, I assumed that I could get legal remedy. I was wrong. I borrowed $5,000.00 for an attorney who turned out to be a party of taking my babies from me. (I have evidence and documentation to support this.) I even have him admitting this on audio tape. He spent the entire $5,000.00 in an eight week period. After he had spent all of the money I had paid him and after I learned that he was working against me, I let him withdraw.
I had to borrow another $5,000.00 in order to hire yet another attorney. He spent the entire amount in less than two months as well. He wrote me less than a week before a hearing in March 1999 and told me that unless I sent him another $5,000.00 in two days, he would not represent me at my hearing. (I have a copy of this letter.) The judge allowed him to withdraw at my hearing and she forced me to represent myself - even though she stated that she believed I was too mentally ill to parent my own babies. (I have the transcript of this hearing.) She awarded my ex-husband sole custody of our babies and ordered me to pay him child support and health insurance. I was served with a motion for sanctions at this hearing as well. (I had filed an application for a protective order against my father-in-law for abusing Matthew.) My father-in-law had abused Matthew while we were temporarily living with them. Even CPS admitted that , based on police reports, etc., they believed my father-in-law abused Matthew. I have this admission on audio tape and also in a letter to a Kentucky State Representative. I was never allowed to enter this into the record though. In fact, I was never allowed to have one witness testify on my behalf - ever.
I borrowed over $3,000.00 in February 1999 in order to fly my witnesses to Texas for a hearing. None of them were allowed to testify. Only my ex-husband's witnesses were allowed to testify. All of his witnesses were court-appointed by the judge with the exception of his mother. I was ordered to pay a supervisor cash in order to see my babies. This is what they do in the Dallas area. I later learned that the judge owns the supervising business. I began writing letters to Governor Bush and others about all of the illegal and unconstitutional things going on in my case and in that county. The judge ordered a mental exam on me. My attorney told me that if I did not take the exam, I would not ever see my babies again. I took the exam since there is nothing wrong with me. The report stated that I was border-line retarded (even though I graduated from college with honors.) It stated that I had an overt thought disorder even though I have a major in English. The report stated that I was not capable of parenting children.
My final hearing lasted for eleven hours and yet, I was never allowed to have one witness testify. I was sanctioned by the court for filing the application for a protective order - even though it was never heard or signed by the judge. I was sanctioned in the amount of $10,000.00 and was ordered to write a letter of apology to my ex-in-laws. I was then ordered to see a psychiatrist and begin taking medication. The judge further ordered that any new psychiatric reports were to be sealed. In other words, any reports that would state that I'm okay were to be sealed. I was given only supervised visitation which I would have to pay for. I was ordered to pay child support and health insurance. I was permanently enjoined from ever filing any complaint against my ex-husband or any member in his family or any child abuse complaints.
My divorce decree is the most bizarre document you will ever see. My court transcripts are bizarre as well. I tried to get the Kentucky court to take jurisdiction since Kentucky is the home state of both of my babies. Yet, for some unknown reason, the judge here made a deal with the judge in Texas to let Texas have my babies. I have a copy of a letter from the judge in Kentucky to the judge in Texas stating this. I have filed an appeal in Kentucky. I have also filed an appeal in Texas. Channel 8 in Dallas did a story on me on February 15, 2000 entitled "Mom Labled Dangerous Battles for Custody of Kids." This can be located at www.wfaa.com. A Dallas attorney who saw my story agreed to file my appeal in Texas. I have heard nothing from either appeal as yet. I have tried to visit my children and I have been warned by the judge that I will be arrested if I step foot in Texas. My ex-husband has told me that I will not be allowed to see my babies for another fifteen years. He has said that he will hide them if he has to in order to keep them away from me. I have these conversations on audio tape. I have 40 pounds of documentation and evidence, and yet, the court has managed to keep all of it out of the record.
This is just a portion of my story, but I believe that anyone who reads this can realize that something is desperately wrong with the family courts in America whenever a mother can lose all rights to her children. I have lived through the most barbaric experience. In an instant, my world and my children's world was shattered. We would never be free to love or cuddle again. It is outrageous that a "family" law court in America can rule on divorce and custody and all the while neglect to protect a mother's right to love and parent her children. Justice surely betrayed my children. Justice has deprived my children of their birthright -their own mother. I tell my story for two reasons. I want others who have had their children unjustly taken to know that they are not alone and that there are others who know the gutwrenching pain they live with every day. I also want my children to know that I love them more than anything and that I did not abandon them. I want them to know that we were caught up in a justice system incapable of delivering justice. And most of all, I want them to know that I did not remain silent. If anyone wants to contact me, please e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Update 12/6/2000 - I wanted to send an addition to my existing story. There are several important facts I forgot to mention in my original submission. I neglected to mention that I was arrested at my February 1999 hearing for crying when I was denied even a supervised visit with my children. (The court-appointed supervisor had refused to do the supervisions over and over again.) I was arrested in front of my son Christopher, who still has nightmares about it.
A local newspaper editor who was present at my hearing wrote a front page story about my arrest for crying. He was later threatened and his newspaper was shut down. He and his family were literally run out of Rockwall. Before leaving town, he warned me that CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocates) had told him that I would be arrested for selling drugs if I did not stop trying to see my children. CASA was brought to Rockwall by the judge and the court-appointed supervisor was a CASA volunteer. (Although a volunteer, the supervisor charged me to see my children. Payment was due in cash only.) I have never abused or sold any kind of drugs. In fact, I have never even smoked a cigarette. I have always lived a clean, christian life to the best of my ability. This was, however, used against me in court. The judge first issued the restraining order against me because of my christian beliefs.
I was interrogated for hours in court for having dedicated my children to God when they were born and for praying over them. The mental exam was ordered because of my christian beliefs. The mental exam even stated that I ADMITTED having gone to non-denominational churches in my past. My divorce decree states that I'm not allowed to talk about the devil with my children. That is a very bizarre part of my divorce decree.
My court transcripts and documents are like nothing anyone has ever seen. I have not been allowed to see my children since June 1999. I was only allowed 21 hours of supervised visitation before that. I was in labor longer than that with either of them. When I did see my children, I had to see them at the police station - as if I were some sort of criminal. There are no words to explain what that did to me. Matthew was just learning to talk good. He turned to me at that vistit (he was 28 months old) with tears in his eyes and said "I miss you Mommy." I hear him in my sleep sometimes saying that. They had to pry him off of me to take him away at the end of the visit. Laura had a serious head injury at that visit which took place on March 18, 1999. Imagine having to leave her with the people who had caused the injury. My ex-husband just laughed.